November 14, 2008

double blow …

Filed under: Miscellaneous — J Martin @ 7:38 pm

im so fucked up today …

told few friends what i did last night and my desire to keep it going … i hide the reasons though … i think they’re quite shocked with my latest ‘development’ … they told me im destroying my body … and they wondered what happened to me …

thanks for the concern …

but i just couldn’t help myself … and i don’t care …

i thought im gonna hv good luck today … but there wasn’t any … it felt as if im stranger to everyone including myself … kept cool though … laughed, smiled, talked and even discussed some important matters with some people … looked okay on the outer but shattered on the inside …

i myself am not sure what are the real reasons … am i crazy already? am i failed to handle the pressure? am i heartbroken? other reasons?

i think im a good actor though …

someone can sign me up for a movie …


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